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The Gift

by Giselle Colon
The following scene was written by a student in the TDF Residency Arts Project at DeWitt Clinton High School. It explores the element of slapstick comedy as a playwriting tool.


The Gift


Characters
John: 22-year-old, male, bad-tempered
Jack: John's friend
Time: Present day, summer
Place: Jack's house in the kitchen

AT RISE:
(John has just entered Jack's house and goes to the kitchen where Jack is.)

JOHN:
Jack, I want you to do me a big favor.

JACK:
Name it! You know, we been buddies since we been little boys. And I always did favors for you. Remember the time that I let you take out my girlfriend for a walk and...

JOHN:
(Interrupts Jack.) Let's change the subject. Anyway, I bought something wonderful for my wife for her birthday and I want you to hide it till then.

JACK:
You know I'll do it! What did you get her? Huh?

JOHN:
I got her something special that is not your business.

JACK:
Oh well, how many days do I have to hold it for you?

JOHN:
Oh, only about a day or two. Promise me you won't lose it or even touch it.

The Gift
JACK:
Trust me, John, I won't lose it.

JOHN:
Are you sure? You always end up losing my stuff or messing it up.

JACK:
But this time I won't. PLEEEASE let me take care of it.

JOHN:
Okay, okay, I'll let you watch it. (Goes over to the bag to get the diamonds.) Here, promise me you will take good care of them. Promise.

JACK:
Okay, John, I promise. (Takes diamonds handed over to him by John.)

JOHN:
Hey! Watch it! Don't lose them.

JACK:
I'm just going to the sink to get a cup so I could drink. (Opens box and then says to himself.) These diamonds sure are beautiful.
The Gift
JOHN:
Okay, be very careful and remember those are very special.

JACK:
Yeah, they sure are. (Takes diamonds from box and accidentally drops one in the sink.) Uh oh!

JOHN:
What just fell in the sink? Oh God, tell me it's not the diamond earrings. (Hands on hips.)

JACK:
Not actually, it was just one of the diamond earrings.

JOHN:
(Angrily.) What?! Are you crazy?! Do you get dumber every minute?

JACK:
Actually, sometimes I wonder. (Scratches head.)

JOHN:
(Angrily.) Oh shut up! I can't believe you did this!

JACK:
I'm sorry, John, you know how clumsy I am.

JOHN:
Yeah, that's for sure! Now you got to help me get them, because these earrings are one of a kind! (Mumbles to himself angrily.)

JACK:
Look, John, I just wanted to see how beautiful they looked. Anyway, you know I'll help you, so come on, John. (Walking towards sink.)

JOHN:
Let's go then!

JACK:
You know l thought you would kill me for this but I guess you really are a very understanding guy, right, John? (Pats him on back.)

JOHN:
(Looks at him as though wanting to kill him.) Don't talk to me right now; just get the tools.

JACK:
Right away! (Skips towards cabinet.)

JOHN:
You put your tools in the cabinet?! Sheesh, what a moron!

(Jack hands over tools to John and accidentally drops them on John's foot.)

JOHN:
Oooooooooouuuuuuccccccchhhhhhh!!! (Takes injured foot, then hops around on other foot.) YOU IDIOT!!

JACK:
Sorry, did it hurt? (Goes over to him to see if he's okay.)

JOHN:
Get away from me! (Calms down.) Just let me do my work in peace!

JACK:
Sure. I'll just keep you company, I'll just stay here. Don't worry about me. (Walks around, trips on one of the tools, and falls on top of John.) That isn't good.

JOHN:
Get off! (Pushes him off and goes back to what he was doing.) Okay, let's see. (Goes under sink and starts working with the pipes.) I can't get it!

JACK:
Let me do it for you! (Takes tool and does it himself.)

The Gift
JOHN:
Give me that! (Jack doesn't let him take it and does it himself.)

JACK:
There! I did it!

JOHN:
(Surprised reaction.) You did it? YEAAAHHH! (Very excited.)

JACK:
I know, I know, I'm a genius!

JOHN:
See you later, Jack, I gotta go! Yeah, yeah! (Screaming down the hall.)

JACK:
(Screams down the hall.) You're welcome! (Jack goes back inside.)